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“Let’s All Send Him Our Love.” COMICS! Sometimes I Suspect My Chakras Are Stunted.

John Kane

Anthologies don’t sell! Yet people keep publishing them and I keep buying them. Here are some words about three anthologies I read this week. ABC WARRIORS (Langley, Mills & Parkhouse) Anyway, this…

“He Thought He Could Forget The Past. He was Wrong.” COMICS! Sometimes I Find A whole New Way To Bore You!

John Kane

Of late I’ve been a regular Chatty Cathy and no mistake, so as a change of pace I’ve scanned in some House Ads which ran in DC Comics from (and it’s totally arbitrary this) March 1989 to August 1990. I always enjoy looking at these things when I dig out my back issues; they remind me of stuff I have tucked away (and even sometimes forgotten), or nudge me about stuff I mean to pick up at some point before…I come to my senses and start acting my age. Sometimes they just make me shake my head and wonder how that turned out for everyone. Heck, it’s just fun looking at them, basically, and I hope you share my fascination……  Read More…

“We’re JUDGES – We Can Do Any Damn Thing We WANT.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s A Clear Cut Case of Rather You Than Me, Dear.

John Kane

I only had time to write about one comic this time. Sorry. But do please feel free to all club together and make me independently wealthy. I’ll probably manage, oooh, three comics then. Gee, thanks for thinking about it, anyway. This time I continue to big up The Home Side by looking at the very latest issue of 2000AD. It might only be one comic, but it’s a fresh ‘un! Hmm, still breathing so it is! JUDGE DREDD by Sexton, Carroll, O’Grady & Parkhouse Anyway, this.

“Droids Don’t Knock.” COMICS! Sometimes The Darkest Judge of All Is Judge Critic!

John Kane

Not wishing to set a precedent here but in response to a reader comment I look at a volume of IDW’s JUDGE DREDD. There’s little, if any, toilet humour in this one. I’ve got all that out of my system (tee hee!) But if you like icy disdain then bring your skates because we’re doing figure eights! Or maybe I liked it. Ha, Ha, just kidding. JUDGE DREDD by Daniel, Swierczynski & Lee Anyway, this…

“Like Turds in Rain…” COMICS! Sometimes I Act My Shoe-Size Not My Age.

John Kane

Abhay’s below this, so don’t dilly dally, and certainly don’t shilly shally, go there! Do it NOW! Me, I’m still trying to get regular, so here’s another go at that. There’s a lot of toilet humour in this one. It’s the only industry we have left. DKIII by Risso, Azzarello, Mulvihill & Robins Anyway, this…

“I’ve Had Mair Exciting Enemas.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s The Comics of Tomorrow – TODAY!

John Kane

Hey, I finally realised after eight years of looking at Brian (The Guv’nor) Hibbs’ Shipping Lists that due to a temporal anomaly which baffles the greatest scientific minds of our times, I am able to tell the The Americas about certain comics well in advance of when they are able to read them! Or it might be because they are British comics and it takes a bit of time for them to get distributed. That’s a bit mundane though isn’t it? Temporal anomaly it is! So, below the line I give you The Future – NOW! JUDGE DREDD by Marshall, Carroll, Caldwell & Parkhouse Anyway, this…

“Today Is The First Day Of A Life Of Sacrifice.” MOVIES! Sometimes It Takes Me a Bit To Warm Up.

John Kane

It’s 2016! I don’t know about you but I know that the one thing I really need right now is another year to get through! Nothing quite gets me smilin’ like the feeling I’m starting from scratch all over again. Sisyphus ain’t no mythyphus, Camus! Ugh. What is it with time? It just never stops. Ugh. Time. Double ugh. So, before I pull the covers back over my head, here’s some stuff on movies which you’ve all already seen and made your minds up about. I tried to make it even more useless than that even, but it just wasn’t possible. HAPPY NEW YEAR! The movie WHIPLASH (2014) in one panel. Anyway, this…

“Wonderfully PEDESTRIAN.” COMICS! Sometimes I’m Less Than Impressed.

John Kane

There was a new Batman comic out. It was an Event because Frank Miller was reportedly involved. I bought it. Frank Miller may well have been involved in actuality but, honestly, I could only detect homeopathic quantities of Frank Miller. Overall, I thought it was a pretty poor Event and only a mediocre Btaman comic. Yeah, that’s it; I thought I’d spare you having to read what follows. You can if you like, but it goes on a bit. Ooh, what a palaver! DKIII by Miller, Janson, Azzarello, Anderson & Robins Anyway this…

“I Think of Dollar Signs. The Rest is Easy.” COMICS! Sometimes I Think Some Folk Need To Remember You Can Only Sell The Family Silverware Once!

John Kane

Yeah, so I’m not getting it together at all over here. Sorry. Let’s just leave it as I’ll be back in the New Year then we all know where we are. But wait! No one leaves empty handed! So until we next meet let me gift you with the pathetic results of what happens when an old man messes with Paint. Yes! Please be seated and feast your eyes upon a tribute to DKIII: The Childishly Trollingly Fascistic Title, with particular emphasis upon the rocket ship pacing and Shakespearean word play of Brian Azzarello and, naturally, the visually scintillating fireworks of Andy Kubert. DARK KNIGHT III: THE MASTER RACE by Andy Kubert, Klaus Janson, Frank Miller(?) & Brian Azzarello I…  Read More…

“The One You See Coming.” COMICS! Sometimes Moon Knight’s Gonna Drive You Home Tonight!”

John Kane

I am given to understand that self-proclaimed Futurist and alleged butter sculptor Warren Ellis is currently writing the comic book adventures of Britain’s favourite misogynistic throwback tool of the ruling elite. Not only that, but word has reached me that said knuckle faced sop to the Pre-Suez nostalgists like Your Grand-Dad is also currently tumbling out of explosions and beds while adjusting his cuffs at a Multiplex near you.  Talking about James Bond there, not Warren Ellis. Although, having said that, having said that…no, definitely James Bond. So, what could be more appropriate then, than to write about a completely different set of comics Warren Ellis wrote and Declan Shalvey illustrated. Probably a lot of things would be more appropriate, John….  Read More…

“I Ain’t Never…Made Nothin’ My Whole Life.” COMICS! Sometimes I React Quite Badly To The Tiresomely Derivative Violent Fantasies Of The Middle-Aged White Male. Tough Titty.

John Kane

So, hey, you know all the Goodwill I’ve built up with y’all. Let’s douse all that in kerosene and flick a lit match at it. Because, damn, this comic sure rubbed me the wrong way. Sometimes I’m like a mad dog. A sexy mad dog. You’ve been warned. WOOF! WOOF! MEN OF WRATH by Garney, Aaron, Milla & Fletcher Anyway, this…

“THE TRAVELLING PALACE OF IEMUHM ANNOUNCES ITS ARRIVAL IN BRIGHT RUNES” COMICS! Sometimes Houses Are Surprisingly Mobile!

John Kane

In which I write about a single series that is in fact like a whole imprint in itself. Now, I’m not usually one for comics about, you know, the Frangipanis struggle against the Ipanemians on the planet Sega, but I have a weakness for good storytelling, which all of these had. Um, spoilers! 8HOUSE: ARCLIGHT by Churchland, Graham & Maher Anyway, this…

“Somebody Who Should Be Dead Is Alive, Or Somebody Who Should Be Alive Is Already Dead!” MOVIES! Sometimes I Am Reminded That No Matter Whatever Our Country Of Origin May Be We Are All Human And So United By A Fear of Being Stabbed In The Face By A Gloved Nutter.

John Kane

Yes! It’s that thing where I watch some movies you aren’t interested in and then tell you what I think about them, while prefacing my words with a comment My Lady of Infinite Patience made about them. Look, I just haven’t had chance to read anything lately. Sorry but, uh, them’s the breaks. Anita Strindberg in Your Vice Is A Locked Room And Only I Have The Key (1972) Anyway, this…

“Selena Has Already Decided Not To Buy The Lawn Furniture.” COMICS! Sometimes I Look at Saga – The Saga Of The Swamp Thing!

John Kane

It’s Halloween! Gather round, gather round! O, you lucky children! Feast your tiny dead fly sized eyes on a ghoulish gallery fit to chill even the hardiest of souls! Halloween! Sil-VER SHAMROCK! Oh alright, I just scanned in my incomplete Saga of the Swamp Thing comics run. No tricks here, m’dears; only treats! It’s mostly covers but also some pin-ups and even Swamp Thing’s death certificate. Morbidly apropos eh, what? I hope you enjoy looking at them while I creep up behind you. HOO-HA! Gonna wear your face like knickers! SWAMP THING by Stephen Bissette, John Totleben, Alan Moore, Tatjana Wood & John Constanza

“It’s All About The Angles.” COMICS! Sometimes I Hope Someone Isn’t Expecting The Dog Poo Fairy To Clear This Mess Up!

John Kane

As a break from Dredd here’s a look at a sci-fi horror outing remarkable for the artistry of its visual execution. I’ve not noticed anyone go on about this one, but I think it’s worth going on about. So I did. DOGS OF MARS by Maybury, Zito, Trov, Wieser, Bautista Anyway, this…

“SHUT THEM DOWN! SHUT THEM ALL DOWN!” COMICS! Sometimes He’s Such A Stick In The Mud He’s More Like Judge Ludd!

John Kane

In which I provide you with another cheerless slog through a volume of JUDGE DREDD THE MEGA COLLECTION. No charge! JUDGE DREDD by Doherty, Wagner and Parkhouse Anyway, this…

“Justice Has A Price. The Price Is Freedom.” COMICS! Sometimes I Hesitate To Correct An Officer Of The Law But I Think You’ll Find That In This Case The Price is £9.99 Fortnightly. OW!

John Kane

Borag Thungg, Earthlets! Clearly I have nothing useful to do with my time because I have bodged up a master list of the JUDGE DREDD MEGA COLLECTION. As each volume is released I will update the list and the accompanying image gallery. Should I “review” a volume I will link to that volume in the list. So, interested in the JUDGE DREDD MEGA COLLECTION as “reviewed” by yours truly, then this is the list for that. Pretty clear stuff. No questions? Anyone? Good. If anyone wants me to look at a particular volume, just drop me a comment. The volumes aren’t released in order so it’s not like I have a sensible plan of attack. If anyone wants me to…  Read More…

“The Mysterious Phone Interference Spot.” COMICS! Sometimes The Bole Of A Tree Is Just The Bole of A Tree!

John Kane

This time John decides to publicly embarrass himself by looking at something way out of his league- LOVERBOYS by Gilbert Hernandez. He strained himself so badly he couldn’t really think of anything to put here. Aw, bless. LOVERBOYS by Gilbert Hernandez Anyway, this…

“If Only I Could Convince BEVERLY That He’s As IMPORTANT As I Know He Is.” COMICS FOLK! Sometimes It’s 65 Pictures For 65 Years!

John Kane

It’s the 7th October 2015 and that means it’s been 65 years of the chunky wee thermodynamic miracle Howard Victor Chaykin! Today is his day, so I’m going to shut my yapper and below the break you can feast your eyes on 65 images culled from The Chaykin Section in The Kane Garage Archives. Raise your root beers high and let’s all drink to another 65 years of the amazing Mr. Chaykin! THE SHADOW by Chaykin, Bruzenak & Wald Anyway, this…

“I’m Looking For A Creep With Big Feet!” COMICS! Sometimes Travel Can Limit Your Horizons To The Size of an Iso-Cube!

John Kane

In which John beggars belief by actually following up on his threat to look at the Judge Dredd Mega Collection. This time out various, and largely unpleasant, xenomorphs get a quick course in The Law from Professor Joseph Dredd. JUDGE DREDD by McMahon, Wagner & Frame Anyway, this…

“It’s A Set Back, That’s All.” COMICS! Sometimes No Face Is So Stony Time Cannot Erode It!

John Kane

In which I look at a couple of Judge Dredd collections available over here (the UK) in a format which may be unfamiliar to some of you. Still trying to get the spring back in my step so bear with us, eh? JUDGE DREDD by Flint, Wagner, Blythe & Parkhouse Anyway, this…

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