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“I Thought It Would Be FUN.” COMICS! Sometimes They Take The Proverbial!

John Kane

It’s Bwana Hibbs’ Birthday! Happy Birthday, Brian Hibbs! Emotion! Ugh. Enough sentimental nonsense and  back to things of far greater import: is DKIII: TMR improving? Find out below! DKIII: TMR by Kubert, Janson, Azzarello, Miller, Anderson & Robins Anyway this…

“Bedlam In Bug’s Back Yard!” Sometimes The Visual Tribute To Battlin’ Bill Mantlo Has A Second Part!

John Kane

Yes! The post no one demanded! All the visual ephemera I could find within my battered back-issues of Battlin’ Bill Mantlo and Michael “is” Golden’s fizzy kid’s comic confection THE MICRONAUTS. I may have missed one or two, but even so here is art from Michael Golden, Steve Ditko, Gil Kane, Butch Guice etc.. which may very well be shortly lost to time. Not on this old fool’s watch! Feast your eyes! BONUS: Is MICRONAUTS #39 the “Rosebud” to Citizen Hibbs? Wilder things have happened, pilgrim! Have a happy Bank Holiday, from your pugnacious pal Jabberin’ John K of the UK! EXCELSIOR! MICRONAUTS#39 by Steve Ditko, Danny Bulandi, Bill Mantlo, Jim Novak & Bob Sharen Anyway, this…

“Take Him To The BODY BANKS!” COMICS! Sometimes It’s The Little Things…

John Kane

Um, here’s a gallery of comic book covers from a series that Marvel published from 1979 – 1984 as a tie-in to a terrible line of toys. It was also, as of issue 38, part of Marvel’s first tender dalliances with Direct Market only comics (see also MOON KNIGHT and KA-ZAR). The unfortunate Bill Mantlo scripted the series solidly (as was his wont) for its duration, but the real attraction was the cavalcade of artistic talent who put food on their table drawing this stuff. Michael Golden! Gil Kane! Steve Ditko! (Howard Victor Chaykin even did some innards but, alas, no covers). Because of legal what have you, and the fact it was so heavily intertwined with the Marvel Universe…  Read More…

“The Matter of Britain Has A Desperate, Clawed Gravity.” COMICS! Sometimes I Suspect History Isn’t Finished With Us Yet.

John Kane

In which I go up against Warren Ellis’ current series and…the usual snark is not deployed! Find out why after the “More…” INJECTION by Shalvey, Ellis, Bellaire & Fonografiks Anyway, this…

“This Fixation With Twentieth-Century Super-Heroes Has Got To STOP!” COMICS! Sometimes Everything Is In Fact Awesome When You Are Part of A Team!

John Kane

In order to belay any simmering suspicions that I loathe and resent super-hero comics I look at a comic filled to the brim with them. A whole mess o’ super-heroes, a veritable Legion in fact! SUPERBOY’S LEGION by Davis, Farmer, Horie, Horie & Prentice Anyway, this…

“Later, Jeef Cooked The Best Northern Italian-Style Dinner Ever.” COMICS! Sometimes it’s Goodbye, Mr Chitts!

John Kane

To celebrate the release of Batman vs Superman: Collateral Damage and also the appearance of The Punisher on Daredevil I look up at the corner of my living room and wonder if that’s dust or a cobweb. Deciding it’s just a shadow, I galvanize myself and consider a book by Gilbert Hernandez about a woman who kills zombies in the future. ‘Cos I’m dead classy, pal. FATIMA: THE BLOOD SPINNERS by Gilbert Hernandez Anyway, this…

“I Can’t DO This Anymore.” COMICS! Sometimes I Wish I Had A Hammer Too.

John Kane

In which I look at a Batman comic so lacking in self-awareness it unknowingly reviews itself: DKIII:TMR by Kubert, Janson, Miller, Azzarello, Anderson & Robins But I still went on about it nevertheless. Anyway, this…

“…Spring-Heeled Jack, The Duke of Clarence, Walter Sickert, Arthur Askey…” COMICS! Sometimes It’s The Full English.

John Kane

In which I sulkily refuse to acknowledge my recent absence (ask me no questions, I’ll tell you no lies) and just go straight into talking about a comic about an old man who fills his days by chuntering incessantly about nonsense to a disinterested and increasingly uncomfortable audience in the low single digits. I can’t imagine what attracted me to it. ALBY FIGGS by Warren Pleece Anyway this…

“Would You Like A Waffle With Chestnut Butter?” COMICS! Sometimes It’s Safer In The Asylum.

John Kane

Bonjour mesdames et messieurs! Une tasse de thé sans lait, veuillez. Beaucoup merde! Or for those who lack the class I has, and thus do not speak the language of The French: This week John read a graphic novel by Jacques Tardi, who is not Jacques Tati but who is French. Luckily someone had the foresight to translate the book into The Beautiful Tongue or else this would have been a bit of a nonstarter.  You know, what with John being an enormous monolingual xenophobe and all.  RUN LIKE CRAZY RUN LIKE HELL (Tardi, Manchette) Anyway this…

“I Fail To See What’s So Remarkable About Two Robots Dancing.” COMICS! Sometimes I’ll Need To See Some ID Before You Go Any Further, Sunshine.

John Kane

This time out I look at 2000AD yet again, but you can tell I’m getting a bit worn down. Not because you’re perceptive, but because I flat out say so. Then in an attempt to pep things up a bit I take a look at  a one man anthology by the one man affront to all that’s rational! Men want to be him, women want to be with him, and the FBI just plain want him! It’s that loveable scamp, the part-time Cher impersonator and full-time living colossus of Comics, Mr. Gilbert “Betty” Hernandez. And this wretched creature on the end of my critical stick is BLUBBER #2.  (Strictly no kids past the MORE…) BLUBBER by Gilbert Hernandez Anyway, this…

“Oh, Betty!” COMICS! Sometimes It’s Doctor Who And The Pub Made of Haunted Wood!

John Kane

Just for a change I thought I’d look at an Original Graphic Novel rather than a British anthology comic featuring a poo eating robot that talks more sense than most public figures. Naturally, I loaded the dice by picking one by one of my favourite writers working with an artist whose work I have much fondness for. And Michael Easton. Guess how well that worked out for everyone. THE GREEN WOMAN (Bolton, Straub & Easton, Klein) Anyway, this…

“Let’s All Send Him Our Love.” COMICS! Sometimes I Suspect My Chakras Are Stunted.

John Kane

Anthologies don’t sell! Yet people keep publishing them and I keep buying them. Here are some words about three anthologies I read this week. ABC WARRIORS (Langley, Mills & Parkhouse) Anyway, this…

“He Thought He Could Forget The Past. He was Wrong.” COMICS! Sometimes I Find A whole New Way To Bore You!

John Kane

Of late I’ve been a regular Chatty Cathy and no mistake, so as a change of pace I’ve scanned in some House Ads which ran in DC Comics from (and it’s totally arbitrary this) March 1989 to August 1990. I always enjoy looking at these things when I dig out my back issues; they remind me of stuff I have tucked away (and even sometimes forgotten), or nudge me about stuff I mean to pick up at some point before…I come to my senses and start acting my age. Sometimes they just make me shake my head and wonder how that turned out for everyone. Heck, it’s just fun looking at them, basically, and I hope you share my fascination……  Read More…

“We’re JUDGES – We Can Do Any Damn Thing We WANT.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s A Clear Cut Case of Rather You Than Me, Dear.

John Kane

I only had time to write about one comic this time. Sorry. But do please feel free to all club together and make me independently wealthy. I’ll probably manage, oooh, three comics then. Gee, thanks for thinking about it, anyway. This time I continue to big up The Home Side by looking at the very latest issue of 2000AD. It might only be one comic, but it’s a fresh ‘un! Hmm, still breathing so it is! JUDGE DREDD by Sexton, Carroll, O’Grady & Parkhouse Anyway, this.

“Droids Don’t Knock.” COMICS! Sometimes The Darkest Judge of All Is Judge Critic!

John Kane

Not wishing to set a precedent here but in response to a reader comment I look at a volume of IDW’s JUDGE DREDD. There’s little, if any, toilet humour in this one. I’ve got all that out of my system (tee hee!) But if you like icy disdain then bring your skates because we’re doing figure eights! Or maybe I liked it. Ha, Ha, just kidding. JUDGE DREDD by Daniel, Swierczynski & Lee Anyway, this…

“Like Turds in Rain…” COMICS! Sometimes I Act My Shoe-Size Not My Age.

John Kane

Abhay’s below this, so don’t dilly dally, and certainly don’t shilly shally, go there! Do it NOW! Me, I’m still trying to get regular, so here’s another go at that. There’s a lot of toilet humour in this one. It’s the only industry we have left. DKIII by Risso, Azzarello, Mulvihill & Robins Anyway, this…

“I’ve Had Mair Exciting Enemas.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s The Comics of Tomorrow – TODAY!

John Kane

Hey, I finally realised after eight years of looking at Brian (The Guv’nor) Hibbs’ Shipping Lists that due to a temporal anomaly which baffles the greatest scientific minds of our times, I am able to tell the The Americas about certain comics well in advance of when they are able to read them! Or it might be because they are British comics and it takes a bit of time for them to get distributed. That’s a bit mundane though isn’t it? Temporal anomaly it is! So, below the line I give you The Future – NOW! JUDGE DREDD by Marshall, Carroll, Caldwell & Parkhouse Anyway, this…

“Today Is The First Day Of A Life Of Sacrifice.” MOVIES! Sometimes It Takes Me a Bit To Warm Up.

John Kane

It’s 2016! I don’t know about you but I know that the one thing I really need right now is another year to get through! Nothing quite gets me smilin’ like the feeling I’m starting from scratch all over again. Sisyphus ain’t no mythyphus, Camus! Ugh. What is it with time? It just never stops. Ugh. Time. Double ugh. So, before I pull the covers back over my head, here’s some stuff on movies which you’ve all already seen and made your minds up about. I tried to make it even more useless than that even, but it just wasn’t possible. HAPPY NEW YEAR! The movie WHIPLASH (2014) in one panel. Anyway, this…

“Wonderfully PEDESTRIAN.” COMICS! Sometimes I’m Less Than Impressed.

John Kane

There was a new Batman comic out. It was an Event because Frank Miller was reportedly involved. I bought it. Frank Miller may well have been involved in actuality but, honestly, I could only detect homeopathic quantities of Frank Miller. Overall, I thought it was a pretty poor Event and only a mediocre Btaman comic. Yeah, that’s it; I thought I’d spare you having to read what follows. You can if you like, but it goes on a bit. Ooh, what a palaver! DKIII by Miller, Janson, Azzarello, Anderson & Robins Anyway this…

“I Think of Dollar Signs. The Rest is Easy.” COMICS! Sometimes I Think Some Folk Need To Remember You Can Only Sell The Family Silverware Once!

John Kane

Yeah, so I’m not getting it together at all over here. Sorry. Let’s just leave it as I’ll be back in the New Year then we all know where we are. But wait! No one leaves empty handed! So until we next meet let me gift you with the pathetic results of what happens when an old man messes with Paint. Yes! Please be seated and feast your eyes upon a tribute to DKIII: The Childishly Trollingly Fascistic Title, with particular emphasis upon the rocket ship pacing and Shakespearean word play of Brian Azzarello and, naturally, the visually scintillating fireworks of Andy Kubert. DARK KNIGHT III: THE MASTER RACE by Andy Kubert, Klaus Janson, Frank Miller(?) & Brian Azzarello I…  Read More…

“The One You See Coming.” COMICS! Sometimes Moon Knight’s Gonna Drive You Home Tonight!”

John Kane

I am given to understand that self-proclaimed Futurist and alleged butter sculptor Warren Ellis is currently writing the comic book adventures of Britain’s favourite misogynistic throwback tool of the ruling elite. Not only that, but word has reached me that said knuckle faced sop to the Pre-Suez nostalgists like Your Grand-Dad is also currently tumbling out of explosions and beds while adjusting his cuffs at a Multiplex near you.  Talking about James Bond there, not Warren Ellis. Although, having said that, having said that…no, definitely James Bond. So, what could be more appropriate then, than to write about a completely different set of comics Warren Ellis wrote and Declan Shalvey illustrated. Probably a lot of things would be more appropriate, John….  Read More…

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