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“Death Among The Hors D’oeuvres.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s Tough, Tough Toys For Tough, Tough Boys!

John Kane

What would Thunderbirds be like in the world of Judge Dredd? My dog has no nose; why isn’t Robbie Morrison funny? What if the messiah was susceptible to weed killer?  What would be the absolute best name for a character in a very cold place? Can a gun be too big? And if war is so terrible why is it so good for John Wagner? All questions I’ll probably forget to answer in the latest jolly riverdance through the JUDGE DREDD MEGA COLLECTION. JUDGE DREDD: THE HEAVY MOB by P J Holden Anyway, this…

“#i!” COMICS! Sometimes Tenderness Is A Weakness.

John Kane

There now follows a change to our scheduled programme. Settle back as our Argentinian chums Eduardo Risso and the late Carlos Trillo take us on a trip to the near future where everything is awful; simply awful. Just dreadful, darlings. Ugh. (Oh, And I realise Argentina isn’t in Europe but the book was originally published in Italy(?), which is in Europe so check and mate!) BORDERLINE by Risso & Trillo and Brandon

“…Do Not Adjust Your Brains!” COMICS! Sometimes “M-O-O-N” Spells “Moon”, Despite What Tom Cullen Thinks.

John Kane

Judge Dredd on the moon. That’s it. JUDGE DREDD: DARKSIDE by Marshall Anyway, this…

“NOBODY Calls Me CHICKEN HEAD!” COMICS! Sometimes I Hope You Brought A Clean Pair Of Pants.

John Kane

Are you ready to quiver in horripilation at the future terrors accosting Mega-City One’s premiere lawman? No, well come back when you are. JUDGE DREDD: THE HAUNTING OF SECTOR HOUSE 9 by Brett Ewins Anyway, this…

“My HEAD is on FIRE!” COMICS! Sometimes It Makes A weird Clanky Noise When You Go Over 60mph!

John Kane

In which I look at a comic featuring a man whose head is on fire. It’s by Clayton Crain and Garth Ennis; so no soft lads past this point. BRAAAAAAAAAAAS! GHOST RIDER: ROAD TO DAMNATION by Crain, Ennis & Eliopoulos Anyway, this…

“Not Unless He Had Three Legs.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s Nice To Have A Change Of Scenery!

John Kane

In which Judge Dredd is a right gadabout and doesn’t even have the decency to send a postcard. !!BONUS MAP OF THE MEGA-TERRITORIES!! JUDGE DREDD: GULAG by Charlie Adlard Anyway, this…

“EASY THE FERG!” COMICS! Sometimes It’s Not The Fall That Kills You!

John Kane

It’s Valentine’s Day! This Valentine’s Day Judge Dredd’s first and only love, The Law, sends a Valentine…straight…to…his…HEART! JUDGE DREDD: THE DAY THE LAW DIED by Bolland, Wagner & Frame Anyway, this…

“Scream Twice If You Still Understand Anything I’m Saying.” COMICS! Sometimes It’s The Worst of All Worlds!

John Kane

It’s 2017! To start us off I cravenly pander to the swing of things to the Right Wing by looking at a comic with a Alt-Right Nazi as the good guy. Because only in Hell… REQUIEM VAMPIRE KNIGHT by Ledroit, Mills & Collin Anyway this…

“Well, Chuck you, Farley!” COMICS! Sometimes Life is Cheap But That’s Okay Because So Are the Bananas!

John Kane

Sure, right now the site is just saying: 403: FORBIDDEN. Which is less than ideal, and I think a lot of us can relate. But this isn’t the time to roll over, Savage Critics server, this is the time to stand up and keep, uh, writing self-indulgent “things” about old comics no one cares to remember. That’ll show those Ctrl-Alt-Del Nazis! So, anyway, if you can read this then the site’s no longer 403: FORBIDDEN. Hurrah! Let’s bloviate! Well, I’ll bloviate and you can run out of patience once we hit the bit about Ike. AMERICAN CENTURY by Laming, Stokes, Chaykin, Tischman, Bruzenak, Rambo and Jamison Anyway, this…

“This Fixation With Twentieth-Century Super-Heroes Has Got To STOP!” COMICS! Sometimes Everything Is In Fact Awesome When You Are Part of A Team!

John Kane

In order to belay any simmering suspicions that I loathe and resent super-hero comics I look at a comic filled to the brim with them. A whole mess o’ super-heroes, a veritable Legion in fact! SUPERBOY’S LEGION by Davis, Farmer, Horie, Horie & Prentice Anyway, this…

“SHUT THEM DOWN! SHUT THEM ALL DOWN!” COMICS! Sometimes He’s Such A Stick In The Mud He’s More Like Judge Ludd!

John Kane

In which I provide you with another cheerless slog through a volume of JUDGE DREDD THE MEGA COLLECTION. No charge! JUDGE DREDD by Doherty, Wagner and Parkhouse Anyway, this…

“Justice Has A Price. The Price Is Freedom.” COMICS! Sometimes I Hesitate To Correct An Officer Of The Law But I Think You’ll Find That In This Case The Price is £9.99 Fortnightly. OW!

John Kane

Borag Thungg, Earthlets! Clearly I have nothing useful to do with my time because I have bodged up a master list of the JUDGE DREDD MEGA COLLECTION. As each volume is released I will update the list and the accompanying image gallery. Should I “review” a volume I will link to that volume in the list. So, interested in the JUDGE DREDD MEGA COLLECTION as “reviewed” by yours truly, then this is the list for that. Pretty clear stuff. No questions? Anyone? Good. If anyone wants me to look at a particular volume, just drop me a comment. The volumes aren’t released in order so it’s not like I have a sensible plan of attack. If anyone wants me to…  Read More…

“If Only I Could Convince BEVERLY That He’s As IMPORTANT As I Know He Is.” COMICS FOLK! Sometimes It’s 65 Pictures For 65 Years!

John Kane

It’s the 7th October 2015 and that means it’s been 65 years of the chunky wee thermodynamic miracle Howard Victor Chaykin! Today is his day, so I’m going to shut my yapper and below the break you can feast your eyes on 65 images culled from The Chaykin Section in The Kane Garage Archives. Raise your root beers high and let’s all drink to another 65 years of the amazing Mr. Chaykin! THE SHADOW by Chaykin, Bruzenak & Wald Anyway, this…

“If We Pull This Off, I’m Gonna Sh*t!” MOVIES! Sometimes I Catch A Flick Or Two!

John Kane

Sorry! I hate the silent times too, but needs must sometimes. Alas, due to circumstances and stuff I haven’t read any comics for weeks. This is no reflection on comics, but it does leave me with little to lighten your lives with. It may well be that absence makes the heart grow fonder but it doesn’t make writing any easier. (Secrets Made Flesh Dept: Not writing is an astonishingly easy habit to get into. Scarily so.) So bear with me as we all endure a warm up about some movies I watched while gormlessley slumped in a chair at various points during the last howdiddly ever long it’s been. I have prefaced each with the best thing my long suffering…  Read More…

“If I’m Reading Those Erect Nipples Right, YOU’RE Having A Good Time.” COMICS! Sometimes They Might Be A Wee Bit Too Hard-Boiled.

John Kane

Hey, I wrote some words about a comic. They’re under the break, somewhere. I think that’s how it works. Mostly this one is about how people will still be awful in the future and how Rick Burchett is The Balls. Sorry, still shaking the rust off. PULP FANTASTIC by Burchett, Chaykin & Tischman, Bruzenak & Loughridge Anyway, this…

“Seems Like Even The GODS Have Their ACCIDENTS!” COMICS! Sometimes The King Is Still Dead!

John Kane

“Tarru!” to you, too!! Just look at the creators on this thing! It’s like the comic book equivalent of one of those Irwin Allen films where Steve McQueen and Paul Newman jockey for top billing, Fred Astaire tumbles burning out of a lift, Michael Caine shouts about bloody, bloody bees and Gene Hackman tells God off with his steam blistered fists raised. It isn’t a movie, but is it a disaster? TALES OF THE NEW GODS by John Paul Leon, Kevin McCarthy, John Workman & Tatjana Wood Anyway this…

“And He Hasn’t Yet Learned HOW to Lose!” COMICS! Sometimes You shouldn’t Oughta Honk God Off!

John Kane

Gil Kane. John Buscema. Superman. Mortality. Image by Kane, Nowlan, Grant, Lopez, Giddings & Cone Anyway, this…

“He’s Better Than Great, Ricky! He’s SUPERMAN!” COMICS! Sometimes They Are Actually About A Man Who Is Super!

John Kane

Superman. Michael T. Gilbert. Sons and Fathers. Image by Gilbert, Bruzenak & Jamison Anyway, this…

“No WANDERING OFF.” COMICS (and MOVIES)! Sometimes All Other Priorities Are Rescinded!

John Kane

Hello! You can blame this one on a conversation I had at a party. I say party but at my age that’s four men in a suburban living room with some nibbles and tinnies with the conversation always one slurred word away from movies. At that point it’s all about ALIEN from my end of the couch. And so is this huge block of stale drivel. It’s a bit wayward but if you stick with it I do mention comics eventually. Dedicated to the enduring magic of the wrestler, teacher and actor Mr. Brian Glover (1934-1997). Anyway, this…

“I Think Guys Don’t Know These Things.” COMICS! Sometimes I May Be Slow To Praise But When I Praise It Comes Like The Rains!

John Kane

Sometimes people stop me in the street and ask me to stop following them what the best monthly periodical genre comic currently on the stands is. And I tell them, all these people who I’m pretending constantly stop me in the street and ask that question, that the best monthly periodical genre comic currently on the stands is STRAY BULLETS. I haven’t said that before on here because, honestly, I didn’t think it needed saying. It seems I thought wrong. So no blame, no shame and let’s don our knuckle dusters, knuckle down and rectify this shabby state of affairs right damn now. Also, I tell you how to get CHEAP COMICS!!! Yeah, thought you’d like that. Anyway, this…

“…So The VILE APPETITES of Mankind Could No Longer Corrupt The Harmony of My PERFECT BODY!” COMICS! Sometimes These Tales of Hoffman Deliver On The Fantastique But Honesty Compels Me To Admit They Are Sorely Lacking In The Opera Department!

John Kane

Hey, I wrote about a comic and now it’s like it never existed. Maybe I just dreamt it all. That’d be spookily appropriate. Unlikely though. Anyway, this…

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